dani tauber – excerpts from “ghosts”

the best version of myself 
is a little bit drunk and a 
little bit stoned, dancing in 
someone’s kitchen just 
before midnight on
a new year’s eve 
hopefully not too 
long from now.
i catch glimmers 
of her in my 
peripheral
like a ghost. 
she looks so 
happy.

---

likes it violent and bloody
likes it gentle and sweet
likes dancing in the kitchen 
wants to know you, life...love... 
wants a taste

-

she is anxiously blooming 
focused and feral
aching but alive 
damaged but whole 
licking jelly off a knife 
laying mines for fools 
woke up starving 
ravenous
deep

---

but what if i got 
everything i wanted?
what if i had what
i needed? who
could i be with
room to be soft
instead of surviving? 
who am i when
i am loved correctly? 
even the ugly parts?
who am i when i’m
not licking my wounds?
what if i got to heal? 
what if driving over
and smoking a cigarette 
in the cold dark still
helped like it used to? 
would you? who am i
when i come to your 
mind because
she must be lovely
if you still come around
and i’d love to know 
what she’s like
so i can try.


DANI TAUBER is a writer, former music journalist, and urban legend from southern nj. she is the editor of vulnerary magazine and her poetry books can be found at vegetarian alcoholic press. when she's not making images with words, she is making images with light. she has a lot of weird and creepy antiques in her bedroom. she's probably best perceived as a concept.

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